It's been awhile!

I'm 26 weeks pregnant! Time certainly has flown! I haven't updated in such a long time and for that-I apologize. Honestly, living life is so busy. Preparing for these twins, planning a baby shower, being in a wedding, raising a toddler, being engaged, and working a demanding job is time consuming. No worries. I am happy and absolutely loving all of it. Pregnancy is insane. I can't even begin to describe the changes my body is going through carrying two babies. We are over the moon to welcome a baby boy and a baby girl in the next couple of months. I still cannot believe this is happening to us, or that this is my life!

Emerson is doing well and has absorbed all of the change phenomenally. He is absolutely in love with Tim. They are so cute together. He favors him over me at times. It's bittersweet, but also makes me feel great that he has such a good dad in his life and the bond is forever formed. Tim has blown me away. For someone who has never been a dad, he has this parenting thing down. He follows my lead, but also has the confidence to handle everything himself without doubt. He completely has my back and supports me in every way possible. There isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't remind me of what a wonderful mother that I am and how lucky he is to have us. It sounds so cheesey and fake, but I am not even making this up. It is crazy. I never knew men existed like that in this world. He doesn't miss a beat with Emerson and is so involved in his school and therapy life. Emerson is doing so well and his speech has come a really long way. He is still seeing a speech and behavioral therapist, which has really helped him develop and grow so much over the last few months. We could not be more proud of our little guy. He is extremely excited for Rowan and Reed to arrive. We have worked so hard to keep him involved, but to also let him know that he is still our special boy. We have been spending a lot of time doing family activites and excursions now before the chaos begins, or before I am too big to move, which is getting pretty close. I know when I can't manuever and do planned activities, that Tim will step in to take over for me. He already does with taking Emerson to school, or picking him up, so I can sneak in quick naps before/after work. We work so well together as a team without even discussing it. We are completely synchronized and I have no idea how the heck it happened either. I usually start a task, and he finishes it without me even asking. I get Em up in the morning and dressed. Tim gets him breakfast, then puts on his socks, and shoes, while I get ready for work. I make dinner and he cleans up all of the dishes and the kitchen, so I can sit down to relax, or spend time with Emerson. If I need a break, or a moment of peace, he takes Emerson with him to run errands. It is really nice to have a best friend that I can talk to about anything. He absolutely appreciates every piece of this pregnancy and has been so thoughtful and respectful. I can't even type this without tearing up. Gah, I am such a baby, but it is just ridiculous the lengths that this person would go to for myself, and our kiddos. I think what baffles me most is there is no shadiness, or anything at all with him. No crap, no bs. Nothing that I have had to put up with in the past. We truly are just a family and that's that. Nothing comes above our little family EVER. I have never experienced anything like this at all. It is beyond amazing and I cannot believe that I get to marry this person and have babies with him. Okay, I will stop with the mushy stuff, but I usually never express these types of things.

Lately, we have been working hard on our nursery, which is absolutely magical and beautiful. We are doing a deer/woodland theme. The decal we put up on the wall is beyond words. From the bedding, cribs, curtain, and lamps I am just amazed at what we've put together. We aren't done yet and still are in process of decorating, but what we've done so far is beautiful. On top of that, we are planning my shower, which is at the end of this month. I'm doing a unicorn theme. It is indescribable the things that we've arranged for this shower and the gorgeous decor that I've put together. Tim has helped me so much. From spray painting my centerpieces, to cutting out invitations, he has been such a big hand. Let’s not forget about the bedroom we specially redecorated for Emerson. He has a full Super hero wall, dress up caps, super hero lights, bedding, and figurines. We wanted to give him a special, big boy room, so we decorated his first. It looks like something from a magazine.

This pregnancy is completely different from my first. It is very strange to be so cared about, doted on, and downright loved every second of the way. Going to doctor appointments with someone else who is so engrossed in these babies is a dream come true. I never knew what that was like until now. The babies are doing very well an measuring perfectly. Last week, Rowan was 1lb 15oz. I'm sure she has reached that 2lb mark by now. Reed was at 1lb 12oz, so he is creeping behind his sister. Both look amazing. 58th and 48th percentile for weight, which is more than we could ask for with twins. We are hoping for nice size babes at birth. We aren't sure the delivery method yet. I would like to avoid a c-section, so we are just waiting until later to see how these babes are positioning and to ensure all is well before scheduling anything. Tim isn't sure what he supports. He goes back and forth. The c-section seems easier and safer, but the recovery is worse. For me, I want a quicker recovery. The thought of being cut scares me immensely. We just want the babies to avoid any issues and for me to be safe. It is scary!

We are having the best time playing Santa! Emerson sees toys on t.v. and he FREAKS. "Mom, I want this! I want this!" We tell him that he has to be good and write a letter to Santa asking for whatever toy he's looking at. Meanwhile, we already have it hiding out in the basement. It's so cute! This is the first year that he's really been into Christmas and totally understanding it. It makes it even more exciting. We cannot wait!

I'm not sure if i mentioned this, or not, but my sister is pregnant. She just reached 20 weeks, so she is a bit behind me. She finds out the sex of the baby next week. She is doing well though and we are really excited to have kiddos at the same time. Finally, more kids for Emerson to grow up with!! That is all I have ever wanted for him. He has been the solo kid for too long.

I have to tell you guys though...I am so appreciative of everything that has happened in our lives over the last year. It is baffling and so insane. I never knew any of this was going to transpire when I decided to finally give Tim a chance. I wish I had known. I would have done it sooner. Emerson is so happy. It is so freaking cute. Gah. Okay, my hormones can't take this anymore. I think I've avoided updating because I knew it would make me too emotional.

Some normal updates- Tonight, We're going Christmas decoration shopping. Friday, I'm having a "bad moms" night out on Friday. I'm going to dinner and to see the Bad Mom's Christmas movie with my sister and friends, while the boys hang at home. On Saturday, we're taking Emerson to Giggles and Smiles. Sunday, we visit my parents usually. They got a new puppy a month ago, so Emerson likes to go over to play with her. Our dogs aren't as fun now, so he enjoys doing that.  Last week, we took Em to see Frozen on Ice. He was mesmerized! It was so cute to see that. I love our little family!!

That's about all I got for right now. 

Our weekend update

Our weekend was really nice. Emerson, my sister, nephew, his cousin, and I all went to Idewild (amusement/water park) on saturday. The weather was pretty chilly, but that didn't stop any of the kids from swimming. The park is absolutely adorable. I hadn't been in about 15 years. This was also Em's first time visiting. He loved it. I can't wait to go back next year when the weather is a bit warmer and we can stay in the water longer. The drive up and back was pretty long- an hour each way. I would never invest in season passes because I hate driving and I wouldn't want to do that drive all of the time. We have Waterpark passes, but we live right off of the parkway, so it only takes us about 15 minutes to get there, which is no time at all. Who knows what'll happen after I have the twins though. It's a great place for smaller kids, so it might be worth that drive.

 

On Sunday, we spent about 8 hours at my parent's house. It was really nice though to just hang out, laugh, bake, and talk. Em loved it. He had his cars all over there house, on top of a pound of candy that my mom/dad gave him! We were both beat by the time we got home. We watched Frozen, ate dinner, then bedtime. It was a really nice weekend.

 

Tim and I are planning redecorating Em's room. We are actually switching his bedroom into the office, then giving the twins his room. I think both are the same size, but the wall in the office is cut out, so that's why I am switching it with the Twins. I want to put both cribs next to each other and I don't think I can do that with that room's layout. Anyway, we are doing a full on superhero room and doing a gigantic accent wall with Marvel Comic wallpaper. I can't wait! It's going to look so cool. I haven't full decided on scheme yet for the twins. I"m waiting for the gender reveal, but I do have some great ideas brewing. We want to get this all done now, so that we don't have to scramble later. TIm works a lot more in the fall and travels more frequently, so he won't be around as much to do these things. Emerson and I are constantly on the go in the fall too, so I don't want to impede our fun with painting, etc.

 

This week, we are taking Emerson to see Boss Baby at the baseball stadium. They do movies at night when the pirates are away. We'll see how this pans out. If it rains, we are going to stay home. Tim and I have a wedding to attend on Saturday, which means I have to find a dress to wear after work on Friday. EW. I'm not sure what we'll do on Sunday. I have to see what the weather is like. Maybe the waterpark if it's back open then. It's been closed due to flooding for almost two weeks.

 

Oh, and how am I feeling? A lot better. Not nearly as tired, and my heartburn is under control for now. I wish my allergeries would simmer, but I'll take that over nausea any day. I am officially in my second trimester, and I definitely feel MUCH better. I hope I get a bit of a reprieve and this good feeling lasts for a while. It's nice not feeling like death warmed over all day. We are hoping to find out the babies' gender at the end of this month. The anticipation is driving everyone insane! We just want to know, so that we can start planning my baby shower, and buying some things.

 

Alright, have a fabulous week <3

 

Pregnant with twins!!

I haven't written in a long time and I think it's mostly because I had no idea where to begin. Let me give a quick run down:

 

-I got engaged on March 31st, 2017.

-Emerson and I moved into my Fiance's home at the end of May 2017.

-I became pregnant in Early May 2017

-I found out I was actually pregnant with twins on July 27th, 2017.

 

 

Let that ALL soak in...

 

 

WOW. Talk about a comeback story! My head is still reeling with the news that I'm carrying multiples. At this point, we are not sure what the sexes are yet, but are hoping to find out in a few weeks. We do believe the twins will be fraternal as the babies are in separate amniotic sacs with individual placentas. The babies are completely healthy and on track. I am 12 weeks and 4 days along. I'm doing alright outside of extreme indigestion and heartburn. It is almost unbearable to eat because of the affect effects, but I'm on pepcid twice a day for the max dose. I still don't feel like it's working well enough, so I'll be requesting an alternative treatment at my next appointment. The fatigue I was experiencing is starting to subside a bit, which is great. The one day, I had to pull over in Kmart's parking lot to take a nap! It was unreal. Morning sickness, and sickness in general has really tapered off with the exception of feeling sick from the indigestion, or waiting too long to eat.

 

Tim are I beyond excited to be having twins! That's pretty much all we can talk about. Everything we do revolves around Emerson and the twins. We're planning on switching Emerson's room to the office, and putting the twins in his room. Both rooms are about the same size, but I like the layout of Emerson's room better for two cribs. Also, Em's room will be further away from the twins, so hopefully he won't be distrubed by too much crying. He is really excited though. We tell him daily what a great big brother he will be to not only 1, but 2 babies. He constantly asks to touch my belly and gives it kisses. It's REALLY adorable. We plan on involving him as much as possible to avoid any type of jealous issues, or him feeling left out. We have talked so much about ensuring he has one on one time with us, and that he still gets to get out of the house for a few hours each weekend even if its just to go to the movies, or run around the play place at the mall. While I'm on maternity leave, Emerson will continue to go to daycare, so that we avoid interrupting his speech therapy/preschool. I also think it'll be more beneficial to me to be home alone with the twins during that time, so I can build a schedule for them, and also sleep as much as I possibly can. That would be difficult with a toddler. I wouldn't feel safe snoozing with him running loose in the house.

 

After maternity leave, I've decided to go back to work even though I was told that I could stay at home. I told Tim that I'd like to give it a shot continuing to work. We will enroll the babies in the same daycare that Emerson attends now. They are already on the waiting list. If I find that it's too much for me to work, pump for two, and then breastfeed/caregive twins and a toddler at night, then I'll rethink being a stay at home mom. Obviously, Tim will be there helping me as well, but he can't do much in terms of pumping/breastfeeding. I did really well with Emerson and continued for 15 months. It's really important to me to do the same with the twins, so I will give it my best shot.

 

I still cannot believe that this is my life. Initially, we had decided to wait until after our wedding to have more kids. We had even put our deposit down on our venue, and were plunging into wedding planning. This caught both of us off-guard. We had no idea we were having twins either, so that was just another thing thrown into the mix to make us reconsider our wedding. We are going to push it back a bit. We decided to downsize our original plan. We will still keep our venue, but invite just immediate family to the ceremony, then have a nice dinner afterwards. I'm completely happy with this. I would rather not spend $20k+ on a wedding when we just had twins. That would be absurd. Tim is fine either way, but I just could never do that. I'm far too cheap! I don't really care about the wedding part. I just care about the marriage part and our family. We are really happy though, so I feel like we've already won. Who needs a big wedding anyway? I He knocked it out of the park with my ring, so I already feel spoiled beyond belief. I don't need anything else. I just want to have these twins and for both to be healthy. That's really where our minds are right now.

 

 

Living together is going very well. It took a bit of adjusting for me. Emerson adjusted with no issues at all. He walked in like he owned the place, so I'm glad he had no hardship. It was a bit difficult for me because I really missed my house. I gave up my entire home, plus most of our possessions. I donated a lot of items, and gave things away to people who needed it. Tim had better furniture than me, and we upgraded to a new, beautiful bedroom set, so I didn't really need to bring much with me aside from our clothes and Em's toys. I am totally adjusted now though and I feel completely comfortable. It feels like home for myself, Em, and Kodie, plus Tim, his dog (Fenway), and his cat (Boston) have seemed to adjust to us being there too.The cat is still a bit iffy, but we knew he would take awhile to warm up.

 

It is really awesome to have someone on my team and in my corner. As everyone knows, when I was pregnant with Emerson, I had very little support from his dad, then had absolutely nothing from 6 months on. He wasn't excited to have Emerson either. This is a whole new ballgame for me to have someone who is so excited and appreciative for our life. Tim is amazing with Emerson too, which has been such a blessing. I'm glad he has a father figure now, since his bio dad completely dropped the ball.

 

 

Emerson is doing so well and talking so much! His speech has really taken off. It's absolutely incredible and I couldn't be happier for him. He tested out of expressive speech, but is still seeing his therapist for articulation. She says that he was pretty close to testing out, but wanted to continue for a bit longer because she knew he'd benefit. He is pretty independent these days, though he tells us to "PWAY WITH ME" all the time when he's down on the floor with his cars, or playing with action figures. He is so obsessed with The Hulk and Iron Man. It's hilarious how into super heroes he's gotten. He is also really good at brushing his teeth alone, though I still go in for a deep scrub before he's done. He had a bit of a potty training regression, but went four times yesterday on his own, so we are getting there.

 

Alright. I am going to leave it at that, so you can digest. That was A LOT of information. <3

Much needed update!

It has been about two weeks since my last update. I can proudly say that we are healthy…for right now. This morning, Emerson started to cough again and I felt a bit down. My head felt stuffy and a bit like I was developing a head cold. If anything, I hope it’s just a normal cold for both of us and nothing that has us down and out like the last couple of months. It has been really nice feeling good this past week. I do not want to go backward!

 

Our Disney Trip is in exactly 40 days! Can you believe that?! Our magic bands are slowly making their way to my house. Shipping was a bit scattered. I can start scheduling our fast passes in about ten days. You can only do it 30 days out if you aren’t staying on a Disney resort, which we aren’t. I booked our car reservation and call to see what I needed to have handy when we actually get to the rental place. I also bought myself some Disney shirts. I’ll worry about finishing that piece up next month after I’ve slimmed down a bit. I’m going to do a bit of low-carbing in preparation. I don’t want to start too early, or I’ll be burned out before we even leave. Other than that, we are just waiting IMPATIENTLY! The kids don’t seem to really be that excited. Emerson is so small. He hardly understands. My nephew is going to be 13, but he is too cool to show his excitement. My sister and I are exploding though! We cannot wait!

 

This past weekend, Emerson, Kodie (the dog), and I had our very first sleepover at Tim’s house. It went surprisingly well. I was envisioning mass chaos. He has a dog and a cat too, so I figured my dog would act like a nut. Kodie was fine though. She peed in the yard, and was pretty calm outside of trying to get the cat a couple of times. I was extremely proud of her. I do not give her enough credit. Emerson did pretty well. He definitely tested his limits and touched any and everything. He was in cupboards, every room, the fridge, etc. Tim and I had a chat prior to us coming over. I mentioned him child-proofing, and moving things that he didn’t want touched out of Emerson’s reach. I think he underestimated Em’s impulses because he moved very little in the common areas. He did clear a room that will now be Emerson’s bedroom. It already has a bed, etc, but he moved things that Emerson would touch, or knock over. I know it’ll be a work in progress, which he already notated himself. He is working on moving some of his items out of the way, and he purchased a child-proof kit to lock up some of the cabinets, etc. That was pretty major to me. He texted me yesterday and said  something like “Ashley, I am very serious about making this work”, which was in reference to making it work with us merging lives and homes. He sent me a gigantic list of things that he needed to do around the house to accommodate the dogs, cat, and kid, which again, I thought was extremely nice. The poor cat was locked in a room from Saturday night through Sunday morning. He had his litter box, food, and toys, but we felt pretty bad. My dog is small enough to fit into the cat’s hiding spots, so we decided to put a gate up in one of the rooms, so that the cat could jump over and escape when necessary. This way, he isn’t completely isolated, but still has the freedom to roam if he feels brave enough to do so.

 

When I was pregnant with Emerson, I could barely get his “dad” to discuss moving in together, etc. He always said “we have plenty of time to figure that out”, which angered me to the point of me picking arguments with him over it. I couldn’t understand why this person that I was with and having a baby with wouldn’t discuss merging lives/homes. I guess I have difficulty with that now. It’s hard for me to understand why Tim is so willing to do any and everything for Emerson and I to move in with him. It’s beyond incredible and baffling to me, but extremely scary. We both like the idea of having sleepovers to gradually work toward the goal of fully living together. We are very open and are able to communicate about what we need/want, and things that bother us too, which I have absolutely never had in my life. It makes life a lot easier when you can discuss these things. I am not entirely used to it though, which is where the doubt and fear comes into play. That’s just something that I need to work on internally. I definitely tell him how I feel though and he does the same, so we don’t have any secrets there. It’s pretty cool to be able to talk about future plans as well. Scary, but awesome. Emerson liked being at Tim’s house though. He slept all through the night in his room. I brought his blankets, toys, bath stuff, etc. Tim actually bought him some bath stuff too, so that was nice. Less for me to have to bring back and forth. I have never met anyone like this EVER. I don’t even know how to process this all. Is this really my life?!

 

He actually came with me on Saturday to the Children’s Museum. Emerson had a blast, and Tim was such a good sport about it. Imagine not having a kid and spending your entire Saturday amongst a boatload of them at a children’s museum. We were there for 3.5 hours. Emerson had a blast playing. It was nice because while he played, Tim and I were able to sit there just talking uninterrupted, which doesn’t happen often. It was nice watching him be so interactive with Emerson as we went through the different exhibits. We all had a good time. Afterward, Em and I went home. I attempted to give him a nap, which wasn’t successful, so we headed back to Tim’s around 5pm. We hung out, watched “Sing”, and then I cooked dinner. We ate, then watched “Moanna”, then I gave Em a bath, and put him to bed. Tim and I watched “Patriot Day”, and just hung out for the rest of the night, which was so nice. What else was nice was splitting the work. I was a lot less tired. Over time, we’ll have to redirect Emerson less because he’ll be used to the house and not so curious. It was nice because he helped me make dinner, and gave a hand over checking on Emerson. Em slept until about 7am. Tim and I were already up, so that wasn’t a big deal. We are both early birds, which I love. I am such a morning person. Tim made us breakfast and coffee, while Em and I hung out, and watched cartoons. Of course, he was running around like a nut, but that’s to be expected. It was nice to just sit there, but extremely hard. I’m used to keeping busy at home. That was one of the hardest parts for me. Sitting back and just not doing anything. That would obviously change if we lived there, but it was nice to hang back a bit.

 

Emerson and I headed home around 10am. We needed to take the dog home, get ready, then head to my parent’s house. My parents watched Emerson so that my sister, our friends, Tim, and I could go see Beauty and the Beast. It was such a good movie! It was also nice for me to be able to get to do something kid-free with my sister, and my beau. We had a nice time. The movie was great. Emerson was wonderful for my parents too. This weekend, I’m supposed to meet Tim’s parents, but he has to go out of town for the entire week for work. His parents are going to watch his dog, but Em and I are going to watch the cat. His parents live 3 hours away, so they were going to come up for the weekend. I’m not sure how that’ll pan out now, but I feel bad because he didn’t think he’d be traveling. The worst part is he has to work overnight, so that’ll definitely catch up to him after a few days.

 

Alright, guys. That’s about all I have for now. I hope you all have a great week!